I don’t know who told that subtle lie that when you decide on something, you never doubt it. I think we have been sold personal views by people who may have forgotten roots just because they are at the peak right now. The sad part is that people like me accept these views as truth and then beat ourselves down when we can’t meet up to standards.
It’s almost like a sin to doubt, it feels like you’re commiting the abominable for asking questions. You aren’t supposed to doubt. You should be sure enough with what you decided that you just trust it one hundred percent. This is what motivational speakers say everyday. This is what some pastors and social media fanatics sell. Don’t ask questions. Don’t ask questions, don’t doubt. And so, when that iota of doubt comes on, we feel like we are not strong enough and we question our existence and eternity even.
It seems that doubt shouldn’t be a part of our lives. I think we have been so desensitized to ask questions. We have learned to just accept and come to terms with whatever we are told. We are not taught enough to ask questions. Even Job questioned God at the injustice he suffered. So, my question is, if a man could question the Almighty and still be found righteous, why should I keep silent when a fellow man says something I don’t agree with? Why should my questions condemn me and not bring me clarity? Why am I warned to not ask questions? How will I learn if I don’t ask, if I don’t doubt? How will I defend something I can’t question? How can I trust something when I can’t look deeper into its form?
I can’t count how many times I have come across this kind of content on Instagram. All summarised as ‘if you doubt, you’re not convinced. If you question, you’re weak’ stuff. And while I understand the message, I feel it is very okay to still doubt those decisions. These doubts don’t pop up so you can give up and stay down. No. It pops up so you can revisit and remind yourself why this or that exist. You sit and ask questions. You study until you get answers. You plan over again until there are no loopholes left. I feel doubt should arise again so you can later beat your chest and defend that which you doubted if it is worth your conviction.
Why do you think atheists who convert have the most confident and steely conviction? It’s because they doubted more than most of us who are ‘fortified christians’. I know one who let his questions let him veer off and I watched him return. It’s fine that everyone has their own convictions and it is also okay that some won’t agree with it.
What I’m trying to say in essense is that doubt shouldn’t be classified to those who are weak. When you doubt, you ask questions and questions bring clarity. Every answer you need lies around you. You know it but sometimes choose to ignore it. Ask yourself those questions and you will always get an answer.
